It was set. Spoke to work and was able to schedule 7 days with my parents. I was totally excited to be able to spend so much time with them, especially after the news we were dealt about Mom.
I'd spoken to Dad a few times on the phone prior to coming out. He sounded weak, tired and depressed. He'd sigh at the thought of Mom's condition. He'd tell me that he didn't know what to do.
When I told Dad that I was coming out and would be there in a few days, he was so happy to hear that. He couldn't wait...and I couldn't wait to get there...but I had to. Rob and I were in Utah still and had to deliver a couple of loads in California before we picked one up that would allow me to get off the truck in Redding. So I had to be patient.
We finally arrived to Redding. My daughter, Rachelle, came down to pick us up from the truckstop and take us up to Mom and Dad's house.
We ordered one of Mom's favorite meals to take up to the house just in case she and Dad were a little hungry. She loved Popeye's Chicken with mashed potatoes, gravy and a bisquit.
Rob was able to stay long enough for dinner, but had to get back on the truck to head up to Washington with the load of strawberries that we picked up in Stockton, California.
Mom looked weak. She spoke very quietly, nibbled on a little bit of food and sipped water out of her little cup. She sat in her wheel chair and looked very tired. Although, she was very happy to see both of us, her energy just wouldn't allow her to get too excited.
Dad looked tired and worn out. I asked him when the last time was that he'd eaten.
"Oh, I've had a little bit to eat here and there," he said.
"Well, Dad" I said, "we brought some chicken dinner and fixings for everyone.
"Great! Thanks you guys." Dad said with a great big smile on his face.
I asked Mom if she wanted any chicken. She looked up, nodded and said "sure, I'll try some."
I pulled apart a little bit of the chicken breast, a spoonful of potatoes and part of a bisquit. I gave it to Mom and she squinted at the food, crinkled her nose and said that it didn't look good to her.
"Come on Mom, you've got to eat something," Dad said loudly. Mom was hard of hearing and speaking in very loud voices or using sign language was the only way to really communicate with her. I was sort of good at sign language, but knew enough to hold a fairly coherent conversation.
Mom finally began nibbling at the chicken. She actually liked it enough to ask for some more. We were all very pleased to see her eat seconds.
"Hey, Bob...you'd better slow down on that chicken," Rob said in a kind of laughing tone.
Dad was obviously so hungry that he was tearing apart the chicken like some of those movies you see where someone just shoves food in their faces when they are starving. I guess that when you're that hungry, you really can't get the food in to your mouth fast enough. I always thought that was just 'over-acting' on the movie part. Guess not.
"Papa..." Mom piped up. "I need to go potty."
Dad didn't hesitate one bit. He put his chicken down and immediately went over to Mom and wheeled her chair in to the bathroom in their bedroom. Dad closed the bedroom door behind him. Then you could hear Mom crying out in pain. It brought tears to my eyes to hear her like that. I couldn't eat any more, the thought of her being in so much pain clinched my stomach so much that it made feel like I was full.
The thoughts going through my head was, "How am I going to be of any help here when it is clear that Dad has Mom handled and anyone else would just be in the way?" I was beginning to feel like a FIFTH wheel there. Kind of like a fidgety little kid wondering what to do to make it look like I was busy doing something. I had to put my thoughts together quickly so that I wouldn't end up being in the way and being more of a problem than a help.
After a few minutes, Dad came out of the room.
"That's what it's like...every day." He said as he sat down in a chair in the dining room. He put his hands on his head as he moved back the few strands of hair left.
"Oh My," he said as he looked at me. "What are we going to do?" His eyes were slightly red as you could see that tears were beginning to form in his eyes.
I stood up and put my arms around his shoulders, kissed him gently on the head and told him that we'll just take it one day at a time.
It was time to take Rob back to the truckstop. He had to get going if he was to be able to get to Washington in time to deliver his load and still be able to run for a little while after he got unloaded.
After I dropped Rob off, I drove towards Mom and Dads place. I stopped to put some gas in the car since Dad was letting me borrow their Tracer while I was visiting. That's cool. It's a little 4-door car that will be perfect to run some errands while I'm there, if needed.
My mind went over the episode of Mom crying and Dad at almost his wits end over what was going on. What can I do to help out? It was obvious that I can't do anything to help Mom at all. She is a one-person need and Dad was that one-person. Anyone else could cause more pain, plus Moms nerves were so shot from the Chemo and Radiation therapy.
I kenneled our little dog, Gizmo. Rob was keeping our other dog, Kali, with him on the truck. It was just easier that way. Mom could barely handle their two little Chihuahua's, having one other dog there and all three of them barking and running around was more than she could handle.
I returned home and Mom was back in the dining room in her wheel chair. She actually looked a little better. She apologized to me for what I had seen. I told her that she didn't need to apologize at all. I kissed her on the top of her head, stroking her long brunette hair down her back.
"Well, that will probably go away," Mom said as she looked up at me.
"What, your hair?"
"Yes, the doctor seems to think that I'll lose it because of the chemo." Mom put up her hands with the 'oh well' look on her face.
"If she goes bald," Dad added, "I'll still love her, she'll be just like me then," he smiled like a little kid as he rubbed his bald head that still held a few strands of hair here and there. We all laughed.
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